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Brent Serbus

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HEDORAH

Our environment is doomed! From Earth's pollution a new monster is spawned. Hedorah, the smog monster, destroys Japan and fights Godzilla while spewing his poisonous gas to further the damage.
June 18

Getting Old

I saw a 60 year old lady with white pants walking down the street yesterday while I was driving through town. Her pants were tight fitting and white, sort of like a nurse's pants or something. Anyway, she totally tripped and smacked her whole front side on the pavement. She got up and seemed ok so I didn't stop but I got to thinking that if I were younger I probably would have thought it was funny. But I didn't think this was funny at all, so I guess that is just another sign that I'm turning into an old man.
December 10

The Hyena

What makes the hyena such a formidable foe? It isn't his "laugh" or his charm. It is his willingness to sink to any low, to eat from the dead carcass and his overall willingness to survive. The hyena is unpredictable at times but one can always count on his selfish motive of survival trumping any other aspect of social behavior.
 
I know some people like that.
January 09

Looney Tunes on iTunes

I have recently noticed that looney tunes are on itunes for download/purchase. But since I already own Volumes 1 and 2 of the golden collection, I wanted to know which itunes toons weren't on my collections. Heres a list:
itunes toon dvd vol disc
Bugs Acrobatty Bunny 3 1
Bugs What's Up, Doc? 1 1
Bugs French Rarebit 2 1
Bugs Gorilla My Dreams 2 1
Bugs Hare Conditioned 2 1
Bugs Hare Do 3 1
Bugs A Hare Grows In Manhattan 3 1
Bugs Hare Tonic 3 1
Bugs Hillbilly Hare 3 1
Bugs Long Hared Hare 1 1
Bugs The rabbit of Seville 1 1
Bugs Rabbit Seasoning 1 1
Bugs Bugs Bunny Gets the Boid 1 1
Bugs What's Opera, Doc? 2 4
Bugs Easter Yeggs 3 1
Bugs Wabbit Twouble 1 1
Bugs Bugs Bunny and the Three Bears 1 3
Bugs Bugs Bunny Rides Again 2 1
Bugs Baseball Bugs 1 1
Bugs Show Biz Bugs 2 4
Daffy Yankee Doodle Daffy 1 2
Daffy You Out to Be In Pictures 2 4
Daffy Duck Amuck 1 2
Daffy Rabbit Fire 1 2
Daffy Duck Dodgers in the 24.5 Century 1 2
Daffy The Scarlet Pumpernickle 1 2
Daffy Duck Soup to Nuts 2 3
Daffy Stupor Duck 5 1
Daffy Daffy Duck and the Dinosour 3 4
Daffy Daffy Duck Hunt 1 4
Daffy Daffey Duck Slept Here 3 3
Daffy Drip-Along Daffy 1 2
Daffy Book Reveue 2 4
Daffy Robin Hood Daffy 3 3
Daffy A-Haunting We will Go 4 3
Daffy A Pest In the House 5 1
Daffy The Great Piggy Bank Robbery 2 3
Daffy A Star Is Bored 5 1
Daffy The Stupor Salesmane 5 1
Daffy You Were Never Duckier 5 1
Porky Baby Bottleneck 2 3
Porky Boobs in the Woods 1 2
Porky Claws for Alarm 3 3
Porky Kitty Kornered 2 3
Porky Corney Cncerto 2 4
Porky I haven't got a hat 3 3
Porky porky pig's feat 3 3
Porky porky's railroad 4 2
Porky porky and the teabiscuit 3 3
Porky porky in wackyland 2 3
Porky aweful orpha 1 3
Porky by, bye blubeard 3 3
Porky the case of the stuttering pig 4 2
Porky milk and money 5 4
Porky dough for the do-do 1 2
Porky an egg-scramble 3 3
Porky the film fan 3 2
Porky old glory 2 3
Porky paying the piper 5 2
Porky the wearing of the grin 1 2
November 11

Bad Cop Bad Cop

My wife and I got into a car accident yesterday. There is a fequently trafficed cross walk that has a light. Most non retarded people activate the cross walk light, stopping oncoming traffic. The cars get a red light and have to wait until the people cross. Yesterday some desperate housewife out for a stroll decided she'd ignore the cars and walk against the light entirely. There were about five others tagging along with her. So my wife and I stopped so we wouldn't hit anyone, letting the idiots cross by. My wife honked to let them know they were not following the rules. A second later we heard skid marks and then got hit from behind. The car sort of just nicked our back passenger side quarter pannel. Within seconds there were four cell phones all calling 911. The lady I talked to said it has already been reported. They guy that rear ended us seemed stunned, unable to get out of his car. The cop came and started questioning people, starting with the dumb lady who caused it. The cop took her over to the cross walk and asked her if she saw the little red hand, telling her not to cross. She claimed she had no idea that was there. It wasn't actually the lady we stopped for but some fat old guy behind her. After the cop talked to her I noticed a few key eye witnesses leaving the scene. The cop just sort of ignored it, not really paying attention. After the cop had talked to just about everyone I decided to let him know that I was in the car that got hit. He somehow didn't make an effort to talk to me. He was still talking to the dumb woman. "Excuse me, I just wanted to let you know I was in the car that got hit, if you have any questions for me", I said. Without looking in my direction, the officer put his hand up in my face and said, "Sir, I'm talking to this woman now, I'll talk to you later". Note, this was after chatting with her for about fifteen minutes. When it was all said and done, not only did the guy who caused the accident take off without questioning, but the cop actually never even asked me anything. I found this strange being I was in the car and he told me he would get to me later. I don't think I'll be voting for any tax increases in the future that go towards the police force. The guy that ended up hitting us got a ticket for going to fast and not being able to stop. He told the cop he was distracted by a cell phone and that is why he didn't see us in time. But the cop didn't really listen or pay attention. Instead of giving a ticket specifically for that he cited the cell phone ad a 'contributing factor'. Well, it was THE factor. I don't want to sit back and tell cops how to do their jobs but then again, I expect them to be a little more with it. Not letting witnesses leave a scene and at least interviewing the parties involved. Then again, maybe he walked away with a hot tip for a big date.
August 20

Whitey

I got a phone call the other day from an old college friend, Nemer. His name is Steve Nemer but it seems like we all pretty much went by aliases in college. I never had one. Nemer, Twiggy, Dunneback, Hogan, Rhea (dia, ghonna), Mallard and Whitey. Nemer told me that a few days ago Whitey had died. He sounded pretty choked up about it. I asked how he found out and he said that he happened to be reading the Detroit Free Press obituaries. He said he almost spit out his coffee. We both agreed we were shocked by the news. I asked if there were any details about what happened and he said there was no cause of death, just some information on where to make donations, one of them sounding like some form of cancer...something Nemer was sure Whitey didn't have. I tried to cheer him up, telling him that I would have had my money on Twiggy, an obvious choice. The more I think about it the more I understand why Nemer was upset. Aside from when we were 10 years old, college friends, at least these, are the best friends we could have. Five years of best friends. Since college we all have our lives; marriage, "careers", KIDS, problems: life.
We all need to do a better job staying in touch.
Today Nemer called me back, I wanted him to let me know what had happened. He said he met the rest of the crew. Some married, some not. Some bald, some fat. Some still fighting authority and not making progress.
I wasn't there.
I told Nemer to "give people my best" to anyone he ran across. Well, they were all pretty much there, except me. Dunneback, Mallard, Hogan, Twiggy: the core. I'm half tempted to fly out.
As I listen to the rolling stones, thinking I'm in the middle of my own little big chill moment, drinking more wine than I should be, writing something that I'll be embarrassed about later, I feel really shallow. I'm thinking that I'm missing out on some substantial mourning. I'm not sure how bad I feel though. I haven't seen Chris in over 12 years, since I followed him across the country to California after college. He was going to start fresh in the bay area and I was going to split ways and drive up to live with my brother in Seattle. That was the last time I'll ever see him. Sometimes when we see 'see you later' I guess it isn't always true. Casual assumptions. 
June 25

Team Work

Some people think team success has something to do with the aggregate talent of the individuals on the team. They are wrong. It has ONLY  to do with the goals. Do not consider self or individually, these are dangerous distractions. Achieving the goal defines the team. If team members understand, accept and embrace this, they can do anything. If they stray or disagree on the goals and priorities, most is lost. Others can make up for some of this wrong thinking, but ultimately, team goals cannot be met if other things matter.

May 23

Bathroom Privacy?

I went to the potty at work today and noticed that someone had hung a long strip of toilet paper to cover a gap between the stall column and the wall. What on Earth would lead someone to do such a thing? The fact that I have to work in the same building with such creepy people is a little disturbing. The line of sight wasn't even to the toilet. Is the person dancing around in there or something? I think next time when I'm in there I'll "use" that paper blind, big time. When I go to the bathroom and ONLY open stall is the differently abled stall, am I supposed to use it or go upstairs?
November 21

Come Back Ted

I grew up watching Ted Koppel and Nightline. I remember going to bed and turning on my 8 inch black and white tv and after sneaking in a Monday Night Football game. If the game ended before 11:30 I'd flip over to watch Nightline. Looking back I guess it's kind of strange as a 10 year old kid sneaking in a little in depth world news program. There was something in Ted Koppel’s voice; in his delivery that made me interested, something that resonated that what he was deciding to talk about and investigate was very important, that I'd be better off understanding.  

When Koppel announced he was leaving Nightline last year I was disappointed and was not sure what to expect from the new anchor. The uncertainty has since been replaced by distain and disrespect.

I assumed Koppel had left to retire, do other things. I suspected this was spend time with his family, relax and ease into civilian life. The burden of reporting world news on a nightly basis must have been a heavy weight to carry all those years. It was important work. 

The last few months of Koppel's broadcasts on Nightline seemed to show a disturbing trend: splitting what was once a dependable half hour of in depth coverage on a given topic to three 10 minute overviews.  

Since he has left, this has gone even further. No only has the 3 story structure continued, but the show is not really a news show any longer. It is a thin entertainment based magazine. On the day reports on how to deal with the Iraq war comes out two thirds of the show focus on the oj book that's not really going to be a book.

Since Koppel has 'retired' he has popped up on the Discovery channel and NPR, still doing what he does best. I can only read between the lines that he stopped anchoring Nightline because the ABC news execs decided that given the mtv generations attention span, they needed to take the show in a new direction. So they split the half hour into 10 minute surface stories. They hired Martin Bashir, best known up to this point as bring us the micheal jackson documentary. To have Koppel 'replaced' by that clown is a crime. Another theory is that the ABC brass got tired of having to defend Koppel's editorial direction, he wasn't one to shy away of putting what he that was accurate and necessary on the show. 

With so much going on in the world that is important ABC News is doing the viewing public a disservice by not continuing in Koppel's tradition. Doctors don't give sick kids only candy. Network TV shouldn't stop giving us the news.

During Koppel's last broadcast he urged the viewing audience to give the new folks a chance. He warned that if we did not tune in and support the show, it would surely be replaced in short order by a less important format, maybe a comedy or variety show. Well Ted, it seems that is just what has happened.

November 05

Vote for...

With elections coming up soon I want to let all you candidates know that I won’t be voting for any of you idiots who have people stand on busy street corners and intersections holding up signs to vote for you. You don’t understand or care how that screws up my commute by distracting all the rubber neckers and causing traffic jams and I have zero confidence in your ability to represent the people. Find some other way to waste thousands of people’s time. I’m keeping a list of you all and it really pains me to not vote for some of you. I am thinking about making a list for you rods that call me at home too, that really gets to me. Leave me alone and quite pretending that I am so incompetent as to not realize the importance of voting.

October 17

Got Milk?

I was going to get a carton of milk the other day and as I reached for it I started questioning this whole milk thing. Why do we drink cow’s milk? Who started all that and when did it happen? Did it catch on quickly or were these early milk lovers thought as bestiality freaks? Why cows instead of other animals? Do cows think we are perverse for drinking their milk? Do cows want to drink human milk? Doesn’t it make more sense for use to drink human milk? The whole idea of humans drinking cow’s milk seems so arbitrary. And I like the idea of being a dairy farmer for humans…that’d be a lot of fun.
 
Don't read this
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